Tag Archives: social media kids

Throw Your Hands Up in the Air Like You Just Don’t Care?

If you’re like me, you’re embracing the good but not ignoring the bad during this time of self-isolation/quarantine/physical distancing.

Sure, there’s been some lovely bonding time over card games, music and books – and walks – lots and lots of walks and hikes. In fact, my daughter and I have been making mini paintings for our “quarantine art gallery” which we display on our large back window. That has been a lovely side benefit.

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We’ve also had a few sibling/parent or full family card game and board game nights which included a few laughs and some friendly competition.

However, it’s not all been party games, cake-making (though I did make an amazing rich decadent chocolate cake!) and painting. For instance: my older teen was up until 6 am this morning. You read that correctly – he hadn’t gone to sleep yet at 6 am and thought that this was okay!

To me, even though this is a “break” (as he likes to call it) and school is not on, it doesn’t mean we do nothing and give up all semblance of a routine. For instance, I still need to work. I’m working from home most of the time but it’s been busy – and somewhat stressful. And, my partner still works on-site so we both need to get sleep (and food, and groceries, and exercise, and pay bills, do cleaning, etc.) Also, my kids’ online school starts on Monday so both will need to get assignments done and check in with their teachers.

woman in black long sleeve shirtusing a laptop

Photo by Vernie Andrea on Pexels.com

To me, being on quarantine/self-isolation doesn’t mean a free-for-all, let’s throw up our hands and give up. It does mean that I try to cut my kids some slack – let them sleep in a little, eat cake for breakfast once in a while, chat with their friends a lot on social media, etc. but I feel like self-discipline is an important principle and now is a good time for us all to motivate ourselves to achieve something.

That might mean learning to cook, doing push-ups every day, learning to play the piano, to paint, to learn a new language, practise your musical instrument, sing, make videos, write poetry…something!

I’ve been insisting on family walks/hikes every day and doing some chores or reading physical books rather than sit around looking at devices 24/7.  I have to admit, most of the time, both of my teens go on the hikes without complaint. I don’t know if they’ve given up arguing with me about it or they have learned to enjoy it. (: So, I guess that’s a win.

What do you think? Have you thrown up your hands during this time? Let your kids throw up their hands? Doing the home-schooling thing? Teaching them new skills? I’d love to hear your tips.

Yours quarantinely,

Lisa

Canadian Mental Health Week: May 6-12

This week is Mental Health Week and Children’s Mental Health Week in Canada.

group of people holding hands together

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

It’s a good time to consider all of the facets of mental health. Happily, I feel that families, communities, schools, organizations and governments are getting better at recognizing signs, symptoms and remedies.

Even though some stigma remains, more people understand that mental health challenges are common. In fact, according to the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health:

  • 1 in 5 people in Canada will personally face a mental health problem or illness
  • 8% of Canadians will experience major depression in their lives
  • Mental health affects people of all ages, education levels, incomes and cultures

Regarding kids, many wonder why suicide rates for children, teens and young adults seem to be increasing* and why more children (even those as young as 8) seem to be experiencing more stress than in generations past. What might the reasons be?

bed blanket female girl

Photo by Tirachard Kumtanom on Pexels.com

From reading, research and speaking with other parents and experts, here are three top-line theories:

The Sleep Factor

  • Children, teens and adults are getting far less sleep than in prior generations. Whether it’s due to the blue light from our devices, the lure of 24/7 streaming content, being overwhelmed with homework or answering emails, or parents not enforcing strict bedtimes for younger children, we all could use more shut-eye.
  • Sleep allows us to heal our bodies and minds and to recharge for the day to come. It also helps regulate breathing and blood pressure. Without consistent, regular sleep and sleep patterns we put extra stress on our mental health and well-being.

The Failure Factor

  • Over the past year, I’ve read more and more about how parents’ inability to let our children fail and experience disappointment is hindering their ability to be successful later in life.
  • While we may think we’re doing our kids a favor by protecting them from, say, losing a race or failing a test or not making the cheerleading team, it’s important that children understand how to fail. When a child gets a D on their math quiz or is not invited to the dance, she might learn how to do things differently next time and, at the same time, build resilience which can help her deal with future disappointment.

The Comparison Factor

  • Personally I think adults are just as at-risk of this as children or teens. In our social and social media-infused world, we can’t help but compare ourselves to our next door neighbour who just returned from a spontaneous trip to Italy or to our colleague who is taking a year off to write a novel.
  • I’m not at all against social media (in fact, I’m a huge fan) but it can be extremely detrimental when we (or our children) are feeling vulnerable. It’s difficult to remember that people are more than their social media profiles and that most only post the best of their lives – not the tedious chores or the endless amounts of homework or the fight they just had with their sibling.
  • Comparing ourselves to our friends, classmates, or colleagues can bring on feelings of anxiety, inadequacy, depression and doubt. For parents, talking to our kids about social media and its implications and limiting the use of personal devices and video gaming can be beneficial.

Do any of these theories about modern-day mental health resonate with you? Are you aware of your kids’ mental health on a regular basis? Do you speak with them about stress or social media or suicide? I’d love to learn about your own theories and advice.

Feel free to comment on this post or write to me.

Lisa

*Note: The web site linked to teen suicide includes some disturbing content